Whilst Overhead...

[alii_69]

Another new poem!

Whilst Overhead

Nameless faces
Trapped in clich?
Wearing them
Like fine designer suits
Pockets stuffed with lies
Ties hang like nooses
Limp and flaccid
Waiting for blood to boil
Dealing in futures
That to them don?t belong
Sealing a populations fate
Do as I say
Not as I do
Same ol? situation
Day in day out
A never ending mass
Of superficial
The stereotypical.
Society stagnates in
It?s closed views
Minds joined my disease
-intolerance
-hatred
Corruption ? everywhere
Burning
Burning
Burning...
Whilst overhead a butterfly floats back and forth.

[Hannibal]

Building, building...
then a butterfly
Nice change at the end there
and I love the way you opened this peice...
"nameless faces
trapped in cliche"
beautiful!
the middle of the poem seemed very... sketchy, but the opening and closing were really solid.
Nice!

[crazy a]

I'll admit that what I've read of yours is hard for me to grasp. Why? Who knows. Anyway, just now looking at this piece, it hit me. This kinda reminds me of what I've read by Henry Rollins. I dunno. Maybe it'd sound better to me rather than seeing it.